While sitting by the window of the bus, looking at the people around, my heart beats kept telling me that the path i have chosen will make me go Crazy. For me, the meaning of the word "Crazy" was always amazing.Different than the normal human pattern, My Craziness was wild and peaceful at the same time. Which could give me tears of happiness, smiles, giggles, butterflies in my stomach, goosebumps....I could feel filled and empty at the same time. Even though i could see and hear everything around me, i knew i was charmed.A dream...which could be true...or just a dream, which kept me away from the whole world....May be i was mesmerized...
Before the crazy way, my heart started wandering around, everything seemed to be so normal...For quite a long time, life was going just the way it had to go. Colorful yet blurred, melodies yet sadness, dreams not remembered...i used to go to sleep since i had nothing else to do. i used to wake up since that is supposed to be the way life should be. Same old daily routine...riding on the same old roads in traffic, at times peeping into the busy world around, or lost in nothing at all...Everybody around seemed to be a part of some kind of a competition. Trying to win the race of life. No time to smile, no time to be kind.Even if someone is dying next to you, you gotta just walk away...a "sigh" is the maximum you can spare for the world. Bikers riding on footpaths, no value for the one's space to walk.When somebody is trying to cross the road, just honk them away and proceed.No one has the time to let others live. I was almost sick and tired of everything around me. I used to ask myself...Why am i living..?Why this running around..? Whats my destination..? Whats the purpose of my heart still beating...? Why am i breathing..?
May be the answer was yet to be discovered. Being free is not always a good thing for life. Loneliness can eat you up one day, raw. Felt like caught in a spider web, getting more tangled while you try to loosen yourself. Skin seemed so heavy on me...existence of myself started to look like a burden on my own mirror.
One day from nowhere, my phone beeps and a sweet gesture of somebody who felt my presence being out in this wild world. Every other conversation we tried to make, made me looped into a maze from which i didn't wanted to free myself. I was not looking for a destination, no definition for what i feel. just sharing my crazy thoughts, my wild dreams...and i realized that i was standing in front of the mirror image of my own crazy soul.The curiosity to see...to feel...to know more of it, kept me restless....Finally the craziness made me go find this soul of mine...I did not wanted to wait anymore...my heart just had to bounce out as early as possible...I had to be filled and empty...I wanted a glance, a smile, blink of the eyes, dimple on a cheek, and the first thing touched me before the fingers could, was the flow of love from those eyes...i just felt like myself again...like i gained myself back through those eyes...of my soul keeper. I could feel my heart beat at the tip of my toes...like all it waited was for this moment. Just waited for this dream...the dreamer...
No..it was real...goosebumps, butterflies...all i could feel..My eyes were fixed on his dimple...my heart bounced up and down..sweetest smile, calm eyes...and it said to me that " i could give u a whole world of love"...i felt i was beautiful...crazy...the gentle air around him made me fall in love...calmness was his voice, softness was his presence, gentleness was his walk, Dreams were his eyes...my life was stuck at that dimple...Like i believed, that i would find the Angel for my life,..December 13th....i was re-born to be in love....
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